I had this great idea to suggest to my colleagues that we should make a Christmas party. Next weekend everyone is going home for the holidays and I thought this would be a good opportunity to meet one last time this year.
My suggestion was accepted with joy but it was also decided that everyone should bring some food and drinks. Normally that wouldn’t be a problem. I didn’t expect from the hosts to offer their home, organize everything and cook for such a large group. But, there’s always a but.
The first problem is that the party is next Tuesday. Like in three days Tuesday. On Sunday the stores are closed and then on Monday I’m working and in the afternoon we have the company Christmas party. I’m working on Tuesday again and after I finish in the office, we have to go to the party. So when do I have time for planning, shopping, cooking and baking?
Most of the other girls are at home all day. I guess they have also stuff to do. One takes care of a baby, the other works till early afternoon and I’m sure the others are busy with something too. But they can make time. I can’t not go to work, I can’t not go to the company’s Christmas party so where does that leave me?
The other biggest problem is that I have no idea what to prepare. I can cook and bake. I can take a recipe, put the ingredients together and make something out of it. It doesn’t succeed every time, which drives me crazy, but I’m not a complete novice.
I usually cook Hungarian dishes, in a Transylvanian style. This is not an option in this case. This group is Hungarian and they’ll notice if I messed something up or if it doesn’t taste like the original. So what else can I do? Something new, which no one knows yet because like this they can’t compare it. But this means that I’ll have to try a new recipe, which is a bad idea for a party. What if it doesn’t succeed and I have nothing to take to the party?
My reputation is already bad enough, I don’t want to ruin it even more. Last time I cooked for this group, I prepared a pretty decent lasagna but a terrible tiramisu. I followed the original recipe down to the last letter but it turned out too watery and it tasted too sweet. Most of the guests ate it and complimented it, despite its flaws, some were honest and a few asked for ice cream. I pretended not to get upset and tried not to take it personally, but I was and I did. It will be the same this time too, if I fail again.
When my boyfriend heard of having to take home-cooked meal and self-made dessert to the party, his first reply was that we don’t have a house wife like the others and we should just buy something ready made. His point was actually that for our other colleagues, all males of course, it’s easy to say that everyone should bring home-cooked meal because they are nicely at work, while their wives prepare the food. They don’t have to do both.
Either way I really like my work and, even though in these situations it’s tough, I don’t want to be a house wife. Yes, I would probably fit in more in this group, if I would be, and I would have time to impress them with my cooking skills. But I’m not that person and it’s OK.
In the end I think my boyfriend was right that in the last case we will probably just buy something. This whole thing is just too stressful and in the Christmastime we’re supposed to relax and have fun, not worry about such things. So I won’t, I will just enjoy it. Que sera, sera…